You can cancel a friend request on Facebook in seconds, and the other person won't get a notification
When you send a friend request on Facebook, you can take it back at any time before the other person accepts or declines it. The cancellation is silent — they won't see a notification saying you withdrew the request, though they may notice if they check their pending requests list. The process is the same whether you're on a computer, phone, or tablet.
The reason to cancel is usually simple: you sent it to the wrong person, changed your mind about connecting, or realized you don't actually know them. Facebook doesn't penalize you for canceling requests, and you can send a new one to the same person later if you want.
Key Takeaways
- You can cancel a friend request you sent by finding it in your pending requests and clicking the cancel button — the other person won't be notified.
- On mobile, go to your profile, tap Friends, then Pending, and swipe left on the request (iPhone) or long-press it (Android) to cancel.
- On a computer, visit the person's profile and click the "Cancel request" button that appears where the "Add Friend" button normally is.
- Once you cancel, you can send a new request to the same person whenever you want — there's no waiting period or limit.
- The other person's pending requests list will update to remove your name, but they won't receive any alert that you withdrew the request.
How to cancel on your iPhone
Open Facebook and tap the menu icon (three horizontal lines) at the bottom right of your screen. Go to Friends, then tap Pending. You'll see a list of people you've sent requests to. Swipe left on the person's name, and a red Cancel button will appear — tap it to withdraw the request immediately.
The request disappears from your pending list right away. If you change your mind later and want to connect with that person, you can send a new request from their profile at any time.
How to cancel on your Android phone
Open Facebook and tap the menu icon (three horizontal lines) at the bottom right. Go to Friends, then tap Pending to see your outgoing requests. Long-press (hold your finger on) the person's name until a menu appears, then tap Cancel Request.
On some Android versions, you may see a small X icon next to each pending request instead. Tap the X to cancel that request. Either way, the request is withdrawn immediately and won't appear in your pending list anymore.
How to cancel on a computer
Go to the person's Facebook profile directly by searching for their name or clicking their profile from a message or comment. Where you normally see an "Add Friend" button, you'll instead see a button that says "Cancel request" or shows a checkmark with "Request sent." Click that button, and the request is withdrawn immediately.
If you can't find the button, try refreshing the page — sometimes Facebook takes a moment to update what you see on someone's profile. The button should appear within a few seconds of the page loading.
Finding pending requests you forgot about
If you're not sure who you've sent requests to, you can see your full pending list without visiting individual profiles. On mobile, go to your profile, tap Friends, then Pending. On a computer, click your profile picture in the top right, select Friends, then click Pending Requests on the left side.
This list shows everyone you've sent a request to who hasn't responded yet. You can cancel any of them from this view without visiting their profile. This is especially useful if you've sent multiple requests and want to clean up your pending list.
What happens after you cancel
Once you cancel a request, the other person's pending requests list updates — your name disappears from it. They won't receive a notification that you canceled. If they check their pending list and notice you're gone, they might wonder why, but Facebook doesn't tell them you withdrew the request.
You can send a new request to the same person anytime after canceling. There's no penalty, no waiting period, and no limit to how many times you can send and cancel requests to the same person. If you want to send a request again after canceling, just go back to their profile and click "Add Friend."
Why a request might not show a cancel button
If you see "Friends" instead of "Cancel request" on someone's profile, you've already been added as friends — the request was accepted. If you see "Add Friend" again, the request was already declined or canceled by you previously.
Sometimes Facebook takes a few minutes to update the button after you send a request. If you just sent a request and the cancel button doesn't appear right away, refresh the page or wait a few minutes and try again. This is normal and doesn't mean anything went wrong.
Frequently Asked Questions
Will the person know I canceled my friend request?
No. Facebook doesn't send a notification when you cancel a request. They might notice if they check their pending requests list and see you're no longer there, but they won't get an alert about it.
Can I cancel a request after someone has already declined it?
No, because once someone declines a request, it's already gone from the pending list. There's nothing left to cancel. If you want to connect with them, you can send a new request anytime.
What if I accidentally canceled a request I meant to keep?
You can send a new request to the same person anytime. There's no penalty or waiting period. Just go back to their profile and click "Add Friend" again.
Does canceling a request affect my friendship with someone?
No. Canceling a request only affects pending requests — requests that haven't been accepted or declined yet. If you're already friends with someone, you can't send them a request anyway.
How long does a friend request stay pending before it expires?
Facebook doesn't automatically expire friend requests. A request stays in someone's pending list until they accept it, decline it, or you cancel it. You can leave a request pending indefinitely, though it's polite to cancel if you change your mind.