You can cancel a friend request you sent before the other person accepts it
If you sent a friend request and want to take it back before someone responds, Facebook lets you undo it in a few taps. The request disappears from their notifications, and they won't see a record that you sent it. Once they accept the request, you can't cancel it — you'd have to unfriend them instead, which they may notice depending on their privacy settings.
The steps differ slightly depending on whether you're using Facebook on a phone or a computer, but the process takes less than a minute either way. You'll need to find their profile and locate the pending request button, then select the cancel option from the menu that appears.
Key Takeaways
- You can only cancel a friend request before the other person accepts it; after acceptance, you must unfriend them instead.
- On a phone, open their profile, tap the pending request button, and select cancel from the menu.
- On a computer, visit their profile and click the pending request button, then choose to cancel.
- The person won't receive a notification that you cancelled the request, and no record of it will appear on their profile.
- If you accidentally unfriend someone instead of cancelling a pending request, you can send a new request later without penalty.
How to cancel on an iPhone or Android phone
Open the Facebook app and navigate to the profile of the person whose friend request you want to cancel. You can find their profile by searching their name in the search bar at the top of the app, or by visiting their profile from a previous conversation or mutual friend's page.
Once you're on their profile, look for a button that says "Friend Request Pending" or shows a clock icon. Tap that button. A menu will appear with options — select "Cancel Request" from the list. The request is now cancelled, and they won't be notified. The button will change back to "Add Friend" once the cancellation is complete.
How to cancel on a computer or laptop
Go to Facebook.com and search for the person's name using the search bar at the top of the page. Click on their profile to open it.
On their profile, find the button that says "Friend Request Pending" — it usually appears where the "Add Friend" button would normally be. Click that button, and a dropdown menu will show. Select "Cancel Request" from the options. The request is cancelled immediately, and the button returns to its default state.
What happens after you cancel a request
Once you cancel, the person won't see any notification about it. If they check their friend requests, your request won't appear in the list. There's no notification history showing that you sent and then cancelled a request. The action is completely invisible to them.
If you change your mind later, you can send a new friend request to the same person. There's no waiting period or penalty for cancelling and resending — you can do it as many times as you need to. This makes it safe to cancel if you're unsure about sending a request.
The difference between cancelling and unfriending
Cancelling a request removes a friend request you sent before they accepted it. The person never becomes your friend, and they see no record of the request. This is the action you take when a pending request is still sitting in their notifications.
Unfriending removes someone who is already your friend. Depending on their privacy settings, they may notice you're no longer on their friends list, or they may not. If you unfriend someone by mistake, you can send a new friend request after a short delay.
If someone has already accepted your friend request and you want to remove them, you must unfriend them — there is no "cancel" option at that point. The unfriend action is permanent until you send a new request.
If the button doesn't appear or won't work
If you don't see a "Friend Request Pending" button on someone's profile, the request may have already been accepted without you realizing it. Check your friends list to see if they're already there. If they are, you'd need to unfriend them instead of cancelling. Another possibility is that they declined your request, in which case the button will show "Add Friend" again.
If the button appears but tapping or clicking it doesn't work, try closing the Facebook app completely and reopening it, or clearing your browser cache if you're on a computer. Sometimes a temporary glitch prevents the button from responding. If the problem continues, the request may have expired or been declined by the other person without your knowledge.
Frequently Asked Questions
Will the person know I cancelled my friend request?
No. Facebook doesn't send a notification when you cancel a request, and the request won't appear in their notifications or request list. There's no way for them to see that you sent and then cancelled it.
Can I cancel a request after they've already accepted it?
No. Once someone accepts your friend request, you're officially friends. At that point, you can only unfriend them. Unfriending is different from cancelling — it removes an existing friendship rather than a pending request.
What if I accidentally unfriended someone instead of cancelling?
You can send them a new friend request. There's no penalty or waiting period. If you're worried they might have noticed, you could send them a message explaining it was accidental, but that's optional.
How long does a friend request stay pending before it expires?
Facebook doesn't have a set expiration date for friend requests. A request can sit in someone's notifications indefinitely until they accept it, decline it, or you cancel it. Some people may never see or respond to it.
Can I cancel multiple friend requests at once?
No. You have to cancel each request individually by visiting each person's profile and selecting cancel. There's no bulk cancel feature in Facebook for this action.